I believe there is a lesson in everything that happens to you. You may not recognize the lesson, you may not want the lesson and you most likely don't think you need the lesson - but most of the time, its there. I also think that the Universe will keep at you until you learn the lesson. Let me just say that the Universe has got to be exhausted with the lessons it is trying to teach me. I am a a slow learner. I think I recognized the lesson this weekend...
I am a planner. I like to plan, actually I have to plan. Then, I expect my plan to be followed. I am not a "go with the flow" kind of gal. I got nuts when things are off plan. I don't roll with the punches and I don't make the best of things. I am married to a wonderful man who is very flexible, who finds the humor in everything and who tolerates what he recently called - my obsessive compulsive behavior. Sometimes I say to him "what I am going to ask you to do may not make sense, but I need you to just do it and not ask me any questions". Usually, he compiles. I think I've gotten better over the years, he probably thinks I'm getting worse.
It all started Friday night - I don't know why - but it did. Probably just setting us up for the weekend. I was carrying the laptop computer from the living room to the office and somehow lost my grip on it. It came crashing to the ground and the corner landed squarely on my foot. Ouch! I thought I broke my foot and there is a pretty good bruise there. Wow, that hurt. I had a flood of panic that I wouldn't be able to ride or run on Saturday morning.
We got up Sat and my foot was red and sore, but ultimately, it was okay. We headed to the pond to do a few laps and then head out on the bike. Trevor and I both just purchased heart rate monitors that are super awesome. They've been our guide the past few weeks. Trevor's broke earlier this week. When I got out of the water, it looked like mine was breaking too. I found this incredibly disturbing.
Trevor had to be at the store, so he could only ride for about an hour. I was going to ride for three hours. My plan (because I always have a plan), was to start the ride and then Trevor could just turn around and come home when he needed to. Trevor was not up for this plan because he didn't know where I was going to take him, so he wasn't sure he would know the best way home. At the time - this really annoyed me. Thinking about it now, I realize that I am the one with the plan - Trevor goes where ever I chose to go - he hops on his bike and follows me - he doesn't have to think about it or worry about where we are. So, really, its my own fault. But at the time, I was more concerned with my plan and how this change would affect it.
Instead of going with my original plan, we took a different route - more of a loop, that way I could bring Trevor home and then head back out. We were riding along and I heard Trevor yell to me, he had lost his water bottle. I pulled over to stop and wait for him. I unclipped my left shoe and then turned to look over my right shoulder. I then proceeded to tip over to the right, I couldn't get my right foot unclipped fast enough and so BAM, onto the ground I went. My leg was scratched, my hand hurt, my handlebars were bent, my water bottle holder came loose. I was angry and annoyed. Of course, this would not have happened if we had stuck to my plan. The Universe was trying to tell me that people get hurt when we don't follow my plan. Right?
I don't understand why Trevor didn't get on his bike, ride back to our house, pack up my stuff and dump it on the lawn. Probably because he knows that I wouldn't leave and that if he tried to leave, I'd follow him.
We had about 20 more minutes to get him home. I realized that my chain was skipping. When I fell, it messed up the gears. This would make for a difficult ride. Ugh. I dropped Trevor at home and kept going - I tried to stay away from the big hills because my gears would just change on their own and I didn't wan't to fall again. Of course, every time the gear changed, I wanted to cry. Then I'd look at my watch, which was breaking too, and that made me want to cry.
I was almost home and had to go up one super big hill. I got off my bike and walked it because I did not want to risk it. About half way up this hill, a man on his bike came up behind me and asked if I was okay. I told him yes, that my chain was skipping and I was almost home. He asked if I wanted him to take a look. I thought "right, because you'll be able to fix it?" but I said "sure". We pulled off into a driveway. I held his bike while he worked on mine. In about 3 minutes, he had fixed it. Now I really wanted to cry....
This guy probably had a plan for his day - how his ride would go. But he stopped and helped me. I didn't know him, I may not ever see him again, but he helped me. I thanked him, he got on his bike and rode away. He told me to stop by the local bike shop, ask for Jesse and tell him that Tim sent me. I rode the rest of the way home and my chain didn't skip even once.
At this point, my tension all went away. I wasn't annoyed anymore. I actual thought "okay, Universe, I got it." A plan is great, but I really need to work on being more flexible, rolling with the punches, making the best of things, acknowledging other people.
I stopped by the bike shop and Jesse got me all set up. Turns out Tim is his neighbor. I'll be dropping off a thank you present for Tim later this week. I just can't get over how awesome it was that he stopped to help me.
We made it through the rest of the weekend without incident. The lesson got through this time. I just need to remember to tap into this when my plans fall apart in the future. As Denis Leary says in the movie The Ref "Welcome to the real world kid, where things don't always go your f-ing way". So True. So True.