Foster Shilo finds forever

Shilo came to live with us in December of last year.  He was living at a rescue in California that was losing its permits and needed to get rid of the 70 dogs they had.  If not, those dogs would end up back in the high kill local shelter and that would mean certain death.  Most of the dogs at this rescue were high risk, meaning they had been on euthanizia lists before they were taken by this particular rescue.

Our friend, Amanda, who runs the rescue Panda Paws, was helping out by taking some dogs from this place.  Trevor and I decided we wanted to help too.  Tamara, the Executive Director at the shelter where I worked said we could take 4 dogs.  Trevor and I would foster two and the others would go to the shelter until we found them foster homes.

We spent hours going through the pictures and descriptions of the dogs.  After many changes, we finally settled on Lucey and Shilo.  They both had their issues and Amanda warned us that these could be long term fosters.  We were prepared for that and anxious for their arrival.

Lucey and Shilo, along with the other two dogs we took in at the shelter, were part of a big rescue operation called Home for the Holidays.  Every year, an organization called Wings of Rescue, helps transport hundreds of animals from high kill situations in places like California to the northwest.   There were over 400 dogs coming up to Portland and other northwest cities.

HERE  is my blog about that.

On December 7^th, we headed to the Hillsboro Airport and waited for their arrival.  We had gotten an email from the people at the rescue where the dogs were coming from that said Shilo wasn’t very happy that morning and to be careful because he was angry when they put him in his kennel.   We greeted our new arrivals, let them walk around a bit and enjoy the fanfare.  Then we hit the road for home.

Lucey laid down in the back of the car and went to sleep.  Shilo sat as far back as he could and never relaxed.  When we got to the house, Lucey and Shilo both kept their distance. They laid together in the kitchen.  Shilo took quite a while to ever lay down. I remember we made such a big deal out of it when he was actually not sitting up anymore.

Over the next few days we realized that Shilo didn’t understand being petted.  He didn’t want to be touched.  He would run away anytime we got close.  But every time I turned around, there he was.  Looking at me like he wanted to know what this touching was all about.

I sat at the table, doing work and he would come over towards me.  I put my hand down and just sat there.  Shilo wouldn’t look at me.  He would put his head down and side step towards my hand.  I would touch him for a moment and then stop.  Shilo would then move closer to me, still not looking at me, still with his head down.  This went on for a couple weeks, until he finally let us pet him.  And then he realized that he liked it.  He wanted to be touched.  But he still didn’t understand it.

We told him to keep his head up, that he should be proud and never needed to come to us hanging his head.  He needed confidence.  We knew that his past must have been bad.  He had been found in an abandonded house, tied up in the yard with no food or water.  Who knows what had happened to him before that, but by his behavior, it must have been bad.  

Lucey was adopted pretty quickly and I often wonder if Shilo was confused about that.  She was with him at the rescue in California, where the dogs had free roam of many acres.  We wonder if they were friends there.  Then they made the trip from California together, they came to our house and went in their kennels side by side.  Then, one day, we went to the shelter and some people came and took her away.  Then it was just him.

Over time, Shilo became more affectionate.  He would jump up on the couch and lay with us.  He didn’t mind the other dogs, but he certainly wasn’t part of the pack.  Again, he seemed confused by the way that they played.

HERE is another blog post about Shilo and his progress.

The biggest issue of all was his biting.  Shilo did not like to be told what to do.  And he expressed that with fear, a snarl and then a bite.  It typically happened when he was on the couch and we wanted him to get down.  He didn’t mind it as much when I did it, but he really minded when Trevor did it.  I remember once he bit me, it was my fault, I knew it was coming and I didn’t stop what I  was doing fast enough.  He was sorry the second he did it.  It made me so scared and sad for him.  It made me worry about his future.  How would he ever get adopted if he wouldn’t let people get near him.  Who would ever take him?

Months went by.  Other fosters came and went and Shilo remained.  He only had one person even inquire about him.  She came to the shelter and met him.  She really liked him, but didn’t think she was prepared to deal with his issues and special needs.   She asked what I thought and I told her that Shilo needed someone who would be an advocate for him, who would protect him and make sure he wasn’t put into any situation that could end up poorly for him.  If she wasn’t confident she could do that, if she had any doubts about doing that, then he wasn’t the right fit for her.  She agreed and said she was sorry.

Over time, Shilo got more comfortable with me.  Trevor went away for work a lot during the month of February, after that, Shilo was really angry with him.  He wouldn’t let Trevor put him in his kennel and he would snarl at Trevor way too often.  During that time, he became more attached to me.  He started to play with the other dogs a bit more.  He would forget himself and chase after them through the yard. You would see him let go and then realize that he needed to hold back.  Then he would run inside and jump up onto his spot on the couch where he felt safe.

A few weeks ago, we got a hospice foster named Ducky.  Ducky is old – 15, blind in one eye, going blind in the other.  He hobbles around and minds his own business.  He doesn’t see things coming.  Shilo was laying on a pillow in the office and Ducky walked too close to him. Shilo snapped and actually made Ducky bleed.  This is the first time I have ever raised my voice at Shilo. I was angry and I made him go out of the office.

While I attended to Ducky, he was fine – mostly just startled, Shilo stood in the other room, looking at me.  I told him that I was angry and that he couldn’t do that to Ducky.  After about 15 minutes of being mad at him, I was in the laundry room.  I looked out and there was Shilo, standing in the hallway.  The look in his eyes broke my heart.  It was a look that said “please don’t be mad at me….you are all I’ve got”.  I stopped what I was doing, sat on the floor and called him.  Shilo put his head down and slowly walked toward me.  I cried.  I cried for what he had been through and for his uncertain future.  I cried because I didn’t know where his story would go from here.  I cried because he was broken and he may never be able to be put back together.  He needed patience and space and compassion.  Often I feel like that is in short supply.  

I told him to lift his head.  I told him that I loved him and I always would and even though I was mad about what he did, that wasn’t changing. I sat on the floor with him for a long time, petting him, hugging him, kissing him.   That night, he snuggled closer on the couch and I made sure to give him extra love over the next couple days.  I needed him to know that it was going to be okay.

The following weekend, I got a text from Clint at the shelter. Someone had called about Shilo.  I called the man back, not having much hope.  I asked him some questions and told him all about Shilo.  The thing about a dog like Shilo….you have to tell people the worst case scenario.  There is no sugar coating it.  If you make him sound great and then he bites them or their kids or their friends, he can end up dead.  It literally is a life and death situation.  So, I told them.  I said that if they were still interested we could set up a time to meet, but that they wouldn’t be able to touch him.  I laid it all on the line.  The man said he would discuss it with his wife and call me back.

I hung up and looked at Trevor. I said “I know I made him sound awful, but I have to” and he said “I know”.  10 minutes later, the man called back and they still wanted to meet Shilo.  What?  I was shocked.  I was headed out of town, Trevor was willing to facilitate the meeting on his own.  We set it up for Saturday at the park.  Shilo had been to the park twice to meet Joanna and have his picture taken. He was comfortable and happy there.  He has met people there and nothing bad has happened.  I figured that would be safe.

Saturday came and I was out of town.  I was busy working, but thought all day about how that meeting would go.  Trevor sent me a text and told me that the people wanted to adopt him.  I was in complete disbelief.  He said that the wife walked Shilo and that he ever wanted her to pet him.  She sat down and Shilo came over to her, nosed at her hand and let her pet him.  Then, he ran back over to Trevor as if to say “Look Dad, I was a good boy”.  When I read that, I lost it….our little guy did good.  Maybe his time really was here.

They wanted to take him with them on Saturday, but there was paperwork to be done and I would have to do it when I got back.  They were excited about Shilo and talked about a dog they had previously who took two years to warm up to the husband. They talked about how Shilo would be an only dog and never have to be kenneled.  It all sounded perfect.

Trevor told the people that Shilo could always come back to us.  He made them agree that if there was ever any issue, if they ever needed to get rid of him, he had to come back to us – no matter when it was or where we lived.  He would always be ours if he couldn’t be theirs. 

Shilo wanted to know if it was really true that he could have a forever family of his own, like Lucey.  And we told him yes.  It could be.

I got home on a Monday and arranged to meet Shilo’s new mom on Tuesday afternoon at the park.  2:30 was the time.  I didn’t have much time left with my guy.  I always have a heart to heart talk with our fosters before taking them to their forever home.  The conversation is usually the same and I know they understand me.   Shilo and I sat on the floor in the laundry room and I told him that I didn’t know what his future would hold, but I would love him forever.   Any time, any day, if he thought of me, I would still be loving him.  And when he takes his last breath, no matter when or why that is, I will still love him.  Then I told him this “don’t ever let anyone break your soul.  Hold your head high and be proud”.    He licked my face and wagged his tail.  

You see,  when you have a foster animal, you love them as if they were yours.  They are a part of the family, even though we know its not forever.  When they arrive, you don’t know how long they are staying.  It could be a few days, it could be years and that is what we commit to, the uncertainty.  Trevor and I take on the difficult cases. The animals that come to us as fosters all have some issue that needs to be worked through.  We give them the time and space to do that.  When they leave us and go to their forever home, it is deeply rewarding and emotional.  We are sending on of our own into the unknown, hoping for the best, hoping we have done what’s right.  Shilo is the extreme example of this.  He has been our foster for 6 months.  He has had the most issues of any animal we’ve fostered and we were prepared for him to be with us forever.  So the idea that he has found this seemingly perfect home, well…that’s overwhelming.

Shilo’s forever mom was waiting for us at the park. She was early.  She had a new leash and collar for her new little guy.  I put the collar on him, while he stood on my lap and licked my face.  He was giving me his final kisses goodbye.  He walked right over to the car and jumped in to head to his new home.  We drove away behind them and I could see him in the backseat, tongue wagging, looking around as if to say “where are we going? I can’t wait to get there”.

Later that evening, we got some pictures from his new family and they said it was going well.

The next day, I checked with them to see how things were.  Shilo’s mom said that he had been her shadow all day, he had been on two walks and played in the yard.  Sweet Shilo.  He will be an only dog.  He has two cat siblings that he doesn’t mind at all.  His new family likes to camp and they asked us if we thought Shilo would like to go camping.  I think Shilo will like to go anywhere his people go.  And I think these are his people.

Today has been a week since Shilo went to his new home.  He went there as a foster and the agreement was that we would finalize the adoption when they were ready.  Today I got a text message with a picture and they said “We love Shilo and want to finalize the adoption” .  Those are words I wasn’t sure I would ever hear.  

He looks so happy.  That makes me so happy.

 It took a team of people to get this guy to his forever home: whomever got him out of the high kill shelter in California, the rescue groups that organized his flight to us, Tamara, the Executive Director at WCGHS who let Trevor and I chose Shilo, and then worked with Shilo to socialize him, Leah, a volunteer adoption coordinator at WCGHS, who never gave up hope for finding Shilo a home, Joanna, who took the most amazing photos of Shilo and Caroline for getting Shilo into the newspaper as pet of the week.  Shilo’s family saw the picture in the paper and fell in love.  Then there is Rachael, who wrote Shilo’s amazing adoption bio – that made the people fall more in love with him.   To Michelle and Kathy and Clint who were excited to hear the news about Shilo’s possible forever home.  The list goes on and on. I am sure I forgot someone.  But it doesn’t matter…we are ALL a part of this success.  We can’t save them all, but we have saved this one.  We are all a part of his life and he is alive because of us.  There is no greater feeling than that.  I am honored to have played a part, to have served as Shilo’s in between….from who he was to who he will be.  I’ll never forget him.

You want this feeling….call your local shelter or rescue and ask about being a foster home for a pet in need.  You will never be sorry that you did it.  I promise.

Before it was your pet....

You go to a shelter and you choose a dog or cat.  In a perfect word, you love that pet more than anything ever.  They live a full, happy, long, healthy life with you and when its time to head towards the Rainbow Bridge, you let him or her go with dignity and you hold them as they take their last breath.  Your heart is broken and you will never be the same.

You should know that before this was your dog or cat, it was loved by someone at the shelter.  You see...each animal has a story...each is special in ts own way.  They don't just get warehoused at the shelter.  Their personalities come out, each volunteer and staff member has their favorite - the one that they hope gets adopted by the right family, but also hopes is still there when they come for their next shift.

Those of us who work in animal rescue love them all as if they were our own.  We'd take them all home with us if we could.  We worry about them, watch them adjust to shelter life and hope only the best for them.  We wonder what happens after they are adopted.  Some families keep in touch and update us, others are never heard from again.  If they only knew how we crave information about our kids, just a picture or a note that says all is well.

Some dogs and cats have foster homes before they are adopted.  Those people love the animals like their own.  They live with them as part of their everyday life, their routine.  And then they let them go.  Years may go by and those foster families still think of their kids who went on to live with someone else.  I have cried when each one of our fosters has been adopted. I tell each one before they leave that I will love them forever.  I say "I don't know what your future will hold, but I know that when you take your last breath, no matter when that is, I will still love you".  And its true.

Sometimes the adoptions don't work, sometimes the kids come back to the foster home where they are greeted with open arms.  Sometimes they come back to the shelter and its heartbreaking for the staff and volunteers to see those familiar faces walk back through the door.  Because we hope the best for them.

Sometimes they come back in worse shape then they left.  Then we feel guilty.  We feel like we should have done better finding them a home.  We should have somehow known.  Then there are the times when we find out the worst - an adoptive family had an issue with the animal and instead of asking for help or returning them - they've had them euthanized. This is a hit to the gut like nothing else.   It didn't have to end that way and the thought of it is almost too much to stand.

I am lucky that I have worked at a no kill shelter.  Think of the volunteers and staff that work in a place where animals die every day.  Not because they are too sick, but because there is no room, no time.  Imagine leaving your shift on a Thursday, saying goodbye to the animals you cared for that day, only to come back on Saturday and find that some of them are gone....not adopted or transferred...but dead.  Good animals.  Gone forever. Without a chance.

Then imagine listening to a person who has come to surrender their dog or cat because they just don't want them anymore.   I can tell you that we feel no compassion for you when you aren't willing to make an effort and you don't even seem to care that you are saying goodbye.  You should take it very personally when we don't want to make small talk or seem unfriendly.  We think less of you.  Honestly, we do.  The animals at my shelter are lucky, some of them have been with us for years - some cats for 5 years, dogs for 2 - waiting for their new home.  When an owner surrender comes in, it makes me sad, but I know we will find the right home eventually.  At other places, when an owner surrender comes in, the staff knows that animal will die and they will die soon.  So please understand when we don't say "thank you" on your way out.

Then there are the people who have tried everything, who want to keep their pet but can't.  They sob as they fill out the paperwork, they sit in their car and cry for an hour before they can drive away.  They call every day to check and see how their animal is doing.  We cry with them and feel their pain. We tell them we will take good care of their kid and find him or her the right home.  Eventually the calls stop and they become our kid.  Its too much for them to know that their dog or cat is still at the shelter, waiting....

We take your pet back to its new kennel or cage.  We sit with them, we hold them and tell them it will be okay as they cry, stare at the door waiting for you, or throw up with anxiety.  We cry for them because they deserve better.  We cry for them because you don't.  We watch as the days pass...eventually they stop looking for you.  They get sad or angry.  We watch the months go by and we see them start to accept that this may be their new home.  While it makes us feel better to see that they aren't so anxious anymore, it makes us sad because the shelter isn't their home...it shouldn't be their home.

Over time, we harden to the reality of it.  We have to.  Otherwise all our time would be spent crying and being angry.  But there are days when its all just too much.  Days when one too many people come in to surrender their pets.  Days when  one of the long term residents is especially angry or when they have a meet and greet that doesn't go as well as we had hoped.  Days when we see our friends buying from a breeder or getting rid of their pet for whatever reason.  The days when someone we know says "oh you work at the shelter?  Great...I need to get rid of my dog because we are moving and don't want to take him with us".  Those are the worst.  Those days we feel like we are spinning our wheels and its hopeless.

Its just important to us that you know that before you, someone loved your dog or cat.  Someone who gave their time and energy, who worried, cried and will always wonder how their story turned out, loved them and always will.

Its also important that you know after you, someone loved your dog or cat.  Even if its only the volunteer or staff at the shelter.  Even if that animal ends up euthanized due to space.  Or if they are so scared in the shelter that they are marked unadoptable and killed.  Even then - when you couldn't love them enough, someone else did.  You may be able to walk in and drop them off like they don't matter...but some stranger picks up the pieces, loves them and cries for them when they are gone.  And its important that you know WE live with that....every day....because of you.

And we won't ever stop, because if we don't do it....who will?

Diamond Collar Award Winner

Every Year the Oregon Humane Society looks for their Diamond Collar Heroes of the Year.  About a month ago I was forwarded the request by multiple different people. Now that I am work in animal rescue and welfare, one would assume that I know some people and animal heroes. The truth is that I know many.  Every day my path crosses animals and humans who inspire me.  I would nominate them all, instead, I chose to nominate the one animal who changed my world....my Asha. 

The award is given to two animals who have acted to save a human or animal life in peril, who have performed services within the community with undying loyalty or who have overcome incredible odds to survive.   

Here were the instructions on the nomination form:

Please describe in as much detail as possible what prompted you to nominate this hero. Questions to answer that may be relevant to your situation include: What did the hero do?; How do you feel regarding this hero's action; How do you know this animal (or where did you get the animal)?; How have the candidate's behavior, temperament and personality changed since the incident?; In the case of an animal's perseverance, what sets this animal apart from others who have suffered abuse or hardship?

 Here is what I wrote: 

 My dog  Asha is a hero because despite being born deaf, blind, epileptic and full of nuerological issues, she faces the world head on, unafraid and always with a smile on her face.  She is the single biggest influence on who I am today.  She has taught me more about myself and our world in last 18 months than I had learned in the previous 37 years of my life.  

My husband and I adopted Asha from OHS in July of 2011.    Asha had 6 brothers and sisters, the entire litter of 7 puppies was born deaf and blind.  When the person who bred her realized this, he drowned the pups.  Asha was spared and ended up at OHS.  She was placed in a foster home and we adopted her when she was 5 months old.   Asha seemed like a normal puppy, she just needed a little extra attention.  Then, two weeks after we she came home to us, she had her first seizure.  After that, she was never the same.  From that point forward, Asha struggled with anxiety, obsessive compulsive behaviors, spinning, barking, restlessness.  Our house was chaos, our lives unmanageable.  Asha could not sleep through the night and so I slept on the bathroom floor with her so I could be close when she woke in a panic.  Our other animals started exhibiting behavioral issues because of all the mayhem.  We had no idea what we  were going to do.  We searched for help and boy did we find it.

Having Asha in our lives has allowed us to find so many regular people doing extraordinary things.  She has allowed regular people to become heros and to me, that is part of what its all about;  To  inspire others to be heros in their own way.  Asha has certainly done that.

 We currently work with a behavorial vet, a trainer who comes to our home and a Chinese Medicine practitioner who treats Asha with acupuncture, Chinese herbs and food therapy.  These people have worked tirelessly to get Asha to a place of equilibrium.  Without them, I don’t know where we would be.  Because of them, we thrive.  We wouldn’t know these people if it weren’t for Asha.   They share her story and are always asking us to talk to someone who is having issues with their pet or struggling with treatments.  Asha’s story always inspires. 

No matter how bad things have been and how hopeless we have felt, Asha has always been happy.  She loves to meet new people and experience new things.  She is never afraid.  She is excited to get into the car because she can’t wait to see where we are going and who we will meet.  Many people comment how beautiful she is, they are surprised that she is deaf and blind. They will ask “what do you do with a deaf and blind dog?”  Or they will feel sorry for her.  But she is not sorry for herself and she leads a very full life.   She loves having the opportunity to educate people about special need pets and irresponsible breeding.

 One of my favorite experiences with Asha was when she met a deaf woman at the pet store.  The woman could tell Asha was different and asked me about her, if she was deaf. I said yes.  She asked if Asha knew sign language and I said that she was also blind.  The woman  sat down on the floor and cried while she pet Asha.  Asha, leaned into her, closed her eyes and comforted the woman.  It was beautiful and really made me realize what an effect this sweet creature has on others. 

Asha story caused me and my husband to become much more involved in animal welfare.  We started to research double merle Aussies, which is what Asha is.  We learned about breeders and rescues.  

After we had Asha for about six months, we contacted her foster father and asked if he wanted to meet her.  When Asha met Davis, it was obvious that she remembered him.  Watching the two of them together made us want to return the favor and pay it forward in some way.  When we truly realized the impact that this foster home had on our Asha, we decided that we wanted to be foster parents as well.

 In July of 2012, we took in our first foster pets.  We have fostered over 20 dogs and cats since then.

I know all the compassion and hard work that went into caring for Asha before she came to us.  The staff and volunteers at OHS who worked with her, who searched for information about her, who let her sit under their desk (and chew their computer wires), who longed for information about her after she was adopted.  We were at the OHS Top Dog contest last year and a woman in OHS scrubs come up and asked me if Asha was “Pinky”, I said yes and she started to cry.  She said that she worked in the vet clinic at OHS and treated Asha (Pinky) when she came into the shelter.  I was so inspired by all that and in August of 2012, I became a staff member at the West Columbia Gorge Humane Society in Washougal.  

 While some of these things may have happened at some point in my life, they have happened now because Asha entered my world.    I know patience and compassion because of her.   I know meaning and purpose.  I know hope and life and love.  Many dark nights, I laid on the bathroom floor with her, wondering how in the world we would ever survive her. I knew we couldn’t give her up, but I didn’t know how we could keep her.  Some days I would cry at the impossibility of the situation.  At those times, Asha would come and lean into me, if only for a moment, as if to say “hang in there, it will get better”. She has taught me a thousand lessons about everything under the sun.   She held a mirror up to me and allowed me to see so many things that I had ignored.   Because of her, I took action on the things that I have always believed.   Those things are now my truths – compassion, selflessness, commitment, love, hope, service.   A true hero doesn’t just save you, they inspire you to save yourself and to save others. 

I am alive, in the true sense of the word, because of Asha.  She didn’t pull me from a burning building or sense that I was having a heart attack, but she gave my life meaning, direction and purpose.  In that sense, she saved me…she saved me from an ordinary life.  And for that, she will forever be my hero. 

I didn't tell anyone that I was nominating Asha.  It really just felt good to write it all down and send it off to someone.  Last week I got the email that she was chosen.  Next week we will attend an awards luncheon at the MAC Club in downtown Portland. Asha will be recognized as well as one other dog - we know him - his name is London and he's pretty amazing too! I am very proud of Asha, a little nervous about how she'll do at a luncheon with several hundreds of people.  I expect it will be her dream come true since she loves meeting new people.  Hopefully she won't jump up on the table and eat anyone's lunch!  I'll be sure to give a full report here...stay tuned..

Happy 2nd Birthday Asha

Our sweet Asha is two years old today.  Two years ago today, our girl and her six brothers and sisters arrived in this world.  They belonged to a breeder.  They were raised as if they would be sold - dew claws were removed.  Then, around 7 weeks old, he realized they were all deaf and blind.  Double Merles, "lethal whites", the statistical result of breeding two merle Australian Shepherds, irresponsible breeding.  The solution?  Drown them.  Four of Asha's siblings were dead before the breeder's wife intervened. She took the remaining three pups to Oregon Humane Society.  They could only take one and that one was Asha.

From what the people at OHS tell me, they had a heck of a time with Asha. She didn't do well in a kennel, so they would bring her into their offices and let her lay under their desks where she would chew on their wires and take naps.  They searched for information about dogs like Asha and struggled to find anything.  They were able to place her in a foster home and she was doing okay.  I am sure they wondered how in the world they would find a home for her. Well, Trevor and I found her and in July of 2011 she came to live with us.  We kept in touch with some of the people at OHS.  About a year after we adopted Asha, one of them told me that she always expected to get a call from us saying that it was too much and we were bringing her back. 

Its been a long road, as I have documented here in my blog.  Its been way more than we ever imagined and had lead to so many different things for our family.

I have wondered a lot of things over the last 18 months - were we the right home for Asha, would she be happier some other place, are we doing the right things, what else should we do, have we totally screwed this up, will our lives ever be normal (what's that even mean?), the list goes on and on.  But  I have NEVER wondered if Asha would have been better off dead.  Others have wondered that, but not me.  EVER.  Asha is happy to be alive and it shows....every single day.

The fact that Asha lived is a miracle.  For whatever reason, she wasn't drowned - maybe she was the furthest away, maybe she was the cutest, who knows....but she survived.  She was the one who was taken in at OHS, again, who knows why she was the one...but she was.  The staff took care of her and fought for her, advocated for her, worked for her....working at the shelter, I totally get this part.  Then she came to us and we didn't know what the hell to do.  But we found help....lots and lots of help.  We all survived.

Asha is the best she has ever been.  She still doesn't sleep through the night. I come down and sleep on the couch with her around 2 am every night.  For a long time I was angry about that.  But I am not anymore.  Now I feel like its a priveledge to have that time with her.  She wants her mom.  And that is me.  During the day she is pretty calm.  Right now she is laying at my feet while I type.  A year ago, that just didn't happen.  She is growing up, we are learning how best to meet her needs and we have the treatments for her epilpesy, anxiety, restlessness and mania dialed in.  We have a team - "Team Asha" and they have saved our lives.

Asha is part of our family and I can't imagine our lives without her.  Today we celebrate her life and thank the Universe for helping her survive.   Here is what I can tell you about Asha - forget about the running and barking, the OCD, the not sleeping at night.  Here are the things that matter the most:  Asha LOVES to ride in the car, she jumps right in and can't wait to see where we are going.  She loves to lay on the deck and look up at the sun.  She likes to play with the other dogs and they have figured out how to play with her so that she doesn't lose track of them.  Asha gives hugs to people she really likes.  When Trevor and I get home, she knows if there is one of us there or both of us.  If we both come home together, she finds one of us and then goes to the other and hugs them, then back to the first for a hug.
Asha constantly amazed me with the way she navigates the world.  She lifts her paws higher when she is walking around a new place. She uses her nose and face to map out a room. She can go up and down stairs with no problem.    She has a million little routines and doesn't like when those routines are interrupted.

Our nickname for her is Sissy.  We call her Sissy or Sister most of the time. Sissy doesn't mind getting a bath but when she gets out, she is always really mad and will chase me down to bite my feet.   She can hear a monkey noise on TV and Maggie's highest pitched bark.  She likes soft toys and will carry them around.

Asha loves new things, she is unafraid and goes full speed ahead.  We had a garden this year and Asha really liked the feel of the corn stalks. She would walk through it and lay in it.  She liked pulling the cucumbers off the vine and eating them out in the yard.

She snores loud and often dreams.  I always wonder how she dreams - when you can't see or hear, how do you dream?

She is stubborn and smart and has crooked lower teeth.  And the fur behind her ears crimps when its wet.  She has a little nubbin' tail that wags furiously when she is happy.

She exists for all the wrong reasons and she survives for all the right ones. Today, we celebrate her life and hope that she has many more birthdays.  We know that we were meant to be her family.

Happy Birthday Sissy.  We love you.

Foster Shilo

Sweet Shilo came to us back in December.  HERE is that story.  Its almost been two months and he is still with us.  Shilo has come a long way since we first met him.  When he arrived at our home he would not let us touch him. He didn't understand it.  He was always protecting himself and he was always scared.  He seems to feel much more secure but he still gets worried about things that shouldn't bother him and every day we try to set his mind at ease, that it will all be okay.

Shilo is kind of a loner, he wants to play with the other dogs but he isn't sure how to get involved.  When the others are running through the house, he will run after them.  If they turn around to include him, he runs away.  He doesn't like going in his kennel when we aren't home, but we can't leave him out because of Asha.  Asha will wander the house and if she runs into Shilo, he will snap at her.  We can't have that!

We have tried just about everything to make his kennel a happy place, but I am thinking it just won't ever be. Shilo needs to go to a home where they won't want to kennel him.  He shakes when we put him in there, which is better than the biting that he used to do.  Progress.

We call him Potato, I don't know why, we just do.  We love him so very much and know that he will be a challenge to get adopted and that's okay. If he wasn't with us, who knows where he would be.  He can stay as long as he likes.

Foster Pippy

A couple of weeks ago, my friend and Executive Director of the shelter where I work, told me about a dog at the other local shelter who was in trouble.  Little Bridgette was showing aggression in her kennel and they weren't sure what to do about it, she options were running out.  We had just said goodbye to Jenny and so Tamara told our contact at the other shelter that she wasn't sure we were ready for another dog.  Plus, we still have Shilo, and he was having issues of his own.

Fast forward two weeks and my phone rings.  Its our contact at the other shelter and she says that Bridgette is out of options and can we take her just to see how she does in a home.  If not, they would have no other choice but to euthanize her.  I said that outloud and before I even finished Trevor said "tell them we will take her".

The next day, Trevor went and picked up Bridgette.  She is a one year old Lhasa Apso.  13 pounds of matted fur and anger.  She did show aggression, she was angry at the world. Looking at her, how could you blame her.

We took Bridgette as a foster dog for the other shelter.  After about a week I asked to have her transferred to our shelter where she would have no danger of being euthanized.  One of our foster moms owns a grooming business, saw pictures of Bridgette and said she would groom her at no charge.  So she went from this....

to this....

Getting rid of that matted fur sure made a difference, but she was still very angry.  She ran around trying to itch her back and she kept rubbing her ears on the ground.  If you looked at her she would growl and try to bite.  She would jump up on your lap and want to snuggle but then get angry about it.

We took her to the vet and he discovered that this little girl had a raging ear and skin infection and was certainly extremely uncomfortable and probably in pain.  She was SO good at the vet, ran around and said hi to everyone.  She didn't bite or growl, she let them exam her and even take her temperature.

We started giving her medicine and within two days she became a different dog.  She still gets angry and still wants to bite if you push her too much, but she is also sweet and happy and playful.  She is going to be a challenge to get adopted out, most people don't want to deal with an angry little dog.  We have started calling her Pippy - that is a more fitting name.  Such a little Pipsqeak!

We thought we had found the right family last week.  We told them all about her issues, warned them that she could bite, gave them resources for how to handle it. I don't think I could have been more clear about how she would behave and that it would take time.  The couple loved her (she was awesome at the meet and greet), said that they could be patient and let her come out of her shell at her own speed.  I felt really good about sending her on her way.  She walked out to their car with them and jumped in the back seat.

The next day I got a call from her new dad asking some questions.  He talked about how sweet she was and he just knows she'll get better over time. Again, I felt really good about things.

The following day, her new dad called me to say it wasn't going to work. She had bit his wife and they needed to bring her back.  Awesome.  So I drove down to Portland and picked her up.

 I wouldn't say she was happy to be back with us, she didn't seem to care either way.  She came home and got right back into her routine.  We'll keep looking for the right family. It may take some time, but she's alive and for that we are grateful. 

Asha

Asha has a birthday coming up and I was looking through some pictures of her.  I swear, this dog is constantly smiling!  It has been so fun to watch her grow....