Good news

When I left for work yesterday morning, Wookie was still not good. I worried all day long about what I would find when I got home. The vet had called to check on him and said that it would take a few days for the medicine to work and to just keep an eye on him.

When I got home last night, Wookie was laying between the house and the bushes in the backyard. He always lays there, but usually comes out when he hears me. I called and called his name. He didn’t come. I looked behind the bushes and saw him, but couldn’t tell if he was breathing. I thought the worst – I yelled his name and he jumped, got up and walked past me into the house. He must have been sound asleep.

He was wagging his tail as he walked by me – that was a good sign. He came into the house and layed down. I started doing all my after work chores. I had the fridge open and was getting lunches ready. I heard Wookie come walking into the kitchen and he put his head in the fridge. I hugged and kissed him because this was a sign of improvement. Up to that point, Wookie had no interest in anything he normally loves. And that dog LOVES food. He was right on my heels while I made lunches, had his nose up on the counter and while I usually yell at him for this, I was so grateful and happy to see that he was feeling better that I let him do whatever he wanted.

While we watched TV, I layed on the floor for a bit with Wookie and whispered loving words into his ears. “I’m not ready for you to leave yet” I told him. “I love you”, “you are a good boy”. He looked at me and sighed, closed his eyes and got some much needed sleep.

We didn’t think he was quite ready for a walk this morning, but he did do a bit of whining like he wanted to go. Hopefully tomorrow he will be back to normal or at least closer than today. I hate some of his bad habits and he can be a real jackass, but right now I am anxiously awaiting the return of all his ill-behaved nonsense. Because I love him, regardless of the constant licking of the couch, nose in my food, whining at 3 am for no reason, pulling on the leash while we walk, I love him. And all the rest. And I want our family to go back to normal – no matter how un-normal we are.

For the love of a dog...

Our dog Wookie is sick today and I am really worried about him. Wookie is 13 years old – just Friday we took him and Opal to the vet for their shots and yearly check up. The dr said he was in good shape. He acted normal all weekend long and even last night. I got up this morning to find that Wookie had gone to the bathroom in the house during the night. This is very unlike him. Usually, if he has to go, he’ll cry and cry until we get up and let him out.

He was very slow getting down the stairs and going outside, but I figured he was okay. I went to the gym like normal. When I got home, Trevor asked if Wookie was okay when I let him out this morning, because he found another place that he had gone to the bathroom last night. He also tried to give Wookie a treat and he didn’t want it. This is not right either.

I went out back and he was behind the bushes, against the house, where he usually lays. I called him and he didn’t come – I got his collar and lease for a walk and jingled it. There is not a dog alive that loves a walk more than Wookie. He didn’t respond to me at all. This is REALLY not right. He finally got up and came inside. We took him for a walk and he just dragged behind us. It was clear that he wasn’t feeling good at all.

Trevor stayed home to keep an eye on him. I gave him big hugs and kisses and let for work, feeling sick with worry. About an hour later, Trevor called to say he was taking Wookie to the vet. Our vet thinks that Wookie has an upset stomach, maybe something he ate disagreed with him. They gave him some medicine and special food.
Trevor brought him home, gave him his pills and fed him. Wookie is now resting out on the deck.

I wish I could be at home, laying down next to him, telling him its okay. They just don’t understand and that is the hardest part. I hate to see him so sad. Trevor will work from home this afternoon and should be able to keep a close eye on him. He might be 13, but he’s still our baby.

We love our animals as if they were our children. They are all getting up there in age and the idea that they won’t always be with us is more than I can even bear to think about. I love them, for all their craziness and nonsense, I love them.

So we are sending good thoughts out to the Universe that Wookie will feel better soon.

Helvetia Half Marathon race report

Its been a few years since I've done this race. Its really hilly and that is one of the things I like the most about it. However, I was a bit concerned this year. Last Sunday during our 11 mile run, I had some pain in my right leg - this is a recurring issue due to a difference in leg length. It was made worse because I was running at a pace that was uncomfortable for me, that changed my gait and created some issues.

I saw the chiropractor/physical therapist on Thursday and he made things feel better (after he made them feel worse). I knew I would be able to make it through the entire run, but I wasn't sure I could do it without pain.

I decided that I would take it really slow and steady and not worry about how fast I was going or who was passing me. I would just run the whole way and focus on being strong.

One of my favorite things about races is seeing all the people. I love to see who is there, what they are wearing, how they run, what they talk about. It is so interesting. You see just about everything at these events. I am slow, so lots of people pass me and I get to see them all!

Here are some basic observations:

1. Unless you are going to win, you should not wear a singlet or bikini shorts. Seriously, its just not right.

2. There is a serious lack of information for women runner's regarding underwear and bras. A marketing campaign on the joys of thong underwear and supportive bras needs to be launched. Ladies...nothing worse than running behind someone and seeing their bunched up panty line under tight pants. Also, if you have breasts, lock them down - all that bouncing can't be good for anyone.

3. Guys - put some bandaids on your nipples, no one wants to see bloody circles on your shirt when you are running. Just do it.

4. If you are running with a friend and you are talking, please remember there are others around you - please don't yell your conversation for 13.1 miles.

5. If you think you are going to pass out - stop running and ask for help - finishing anything is not that important.


These are just some things that I thought about during the run.

Trevor really sped up this year - he finished in 1:45 min - 8 min miles - he commented on how different that speed group of runners was. Back in my group, 11 min miles, people cheer at every mile marker - yell at the bands playing, clap their hands. Many are doing their first race, some are overweight. Trevor said that his group never cheered at a mile makers. He said that many of the girls that he saw were wearing just sports tops and that they should wear those all the time because their abs were great. Sounds like a lot less fun than those of us in the middle and the back of the pack.

Plus, he had to stand around for 30 minutes and wait for me to finish. I finished and we went right to breakfast!!

I felt great during the whole run and finished strong. 13.1 miles, its not half of anything.

Edited to include: Trevor asked that I mention his time was 18 minutes faster than his previous best time in a half marathon. This is a huge improvement in time - amazing what losing 40 pounds can do!

11 down, 9 to go

Whew. What a long week. We had an event on Saturday - a 1/2 marathon - so that kind of screwed up my schedule. I usually have a rest day on Friday - this week, I worked right on through to Sunday. Today is my first rest day since last Friday. This was also my hardest week yet - next week will be recovery week, so I do have a bit of a break.

Here is what the last week has been like:
2 hrs of swimming
4 hrs and 55 min of cycling
4 hrs of running
2 hrs of weights/ab workouts
for a grand total of 12 hours and 55 minutes.

Oh...and did I mention that I had a root canal on Tuesday? That added a whole new dimension to my training. On Wednesday morning I swam, then after work, I did a spin class and ran - I thought to myself - "this is how I know I'm crazy". Yet another reason!

I did get a massage yesterday after our half marathon - that made life better!! Overall, I think it was a good week. Our long bike ride on Friday was 3 hours and it was long - I was really hungry. I need to fuel more on the bike.

Next week is our first actual triathlon event of the season - kind of the kick off. It is Sunday night and its the Summer Solstice - 1/2 mile swim in the river, 12 mile bike ride, 3.1 mile run. I'm looking forward to that.

Its hard to believe it is only 9 weeks to go. Whew.

Making Amends.

We all have things in our life that we’d like to change. There are things we have done, that we wish we didn’t do. There are people we have hurt that we wish we hadn’t hurt. There are situations we have handled in ways that we wish we handn’t handled them. I am sure that every one of us has at least one thing that we’d like to go back and do differently. It used to be that you had to live with this forever. There was no going back and setting things right. Nowadays, you can find that person you wronged so many years ago on Facebook. You can send them a message and tell them how sorry you are that you did what you did, said what you said or acted how you acted. The marvels of modern technology.

Its really quite maddening. Let’s say you are the person who was wronged. It was years ago and really, you are over it. You have let it go and moved on with your life. Then, one day, out of the blue, you open up your Facebook and BAM – there is an email from, let’s just say, your ex-wife. And she goes on and on about how sorry she is that she handled things the way she did, blah blah blah.

This happened to Trevor a few months back. He’s been divorced for over 10 years and the last time he had any contact with his ex was about 7 years ago when they had to go to court. I always say that Trevor has no emotions. I believe she got his emotions in the settlement – because from what I can tell – he had them before that. All the same, I don’t care what happened with them – we have our lives now and they are good. All things in the past lead to the here and now. Without that experience, Trevor and I might not be together.

Then, just yesterday, one of Trevor’s oldest friends, whom we haven’t had contact with for about 5 years because he is a complete asshole, contacted Trevor just to say “sorry for how things went down”.

Listen up people – if you are sorry about something….LIVE WITH IT. Don’t ruin someone else’s day by getting it off your chest and making yourself feel better. This only shows what a small person you really are. If you are sorry, don’t behave that way towards anyone else. If you feel badly, good. This is what Trevor has to say about all this: “I don’t need to be reminded that in the past I was a very poor judge of character”. Well said.

Trevor ignored both of those emails and wonders who else is out there that may send another one of these emails. Because we just don’t tolerate drama. From anyone – especially those whom we have banished from our lives. We don’t talk to you for a reason. Accept it. We aren’t all that great and so who cares if we don’t like you.

So if you are one of the people whom are no longer in our lives and you are lurking here, reading about our lives, that’s fine. Please just don’t make contact with us. We don’t care how you feel.

Half way there (aka 10 down, 10 to go)

I cannot believe that I am half way through my training for this triathlon. The idea that I just have to do what I've just done (Only a few more hours a week!) is impossible for my brain to comprehend.

This has been a long week. I started off not feeling too great, but got all my workouts in anyways. Today during my long run, I had a bit of pain in my IT band - I'll visit the chiropractor this week to have that checked out. I also have a root canal in my future. I've been having some pain in my mouth and kept thinking it would go away - which is never a good way to deal with things. I finally went to the dentist on Friday and he is referring me to a person who does root canals. Since everyone was closed Friday afternoon he told me to call first thing tomorrow morning. He wrote me a prescription for an antibiotic and vicodine, which kind of scared me. anyway....

Here is what the last week has been like:
2 hrs of swimming
4 hrs and 25 min of cycling
4 hrs and 5 min of running
2 hrs of weights/ab workouts
for a grand total of 12 hours and 30 minutes.

Saturday was a really great 2 hour and 35 min bike ride, followed by a 20 min run. I felt so great during this workout. Probably the best I've felt this entire time. Wednesday night, I had a 60 min bike ride followed by a 15 min run and I felt like complete crap. It was hot and I had french fries for lunch....that makes for a tough workout. But I did it anyway. That's what its all about.

This upcoming week is the heaviest week yet. We have a half marathon on Saturday and so our long bike ride will be Friday. The week after is a recovery week. Hopefully the root canal will go off without a hitch and I can minimize any downtime.

Taking stock.

There is a man who lives in Lake Oswego named Jeff. He has ALS - Lou Gehrigs disease. He has had it for many years now and has outlived the drs prediction by a long shot. Jeff started a daily email - you can join the list - his website is www.friendsofjeff.com. Trevor and I both get Jeff's daily inspirational emails. The craziest thing is that he almost always hits the nail on the head with us. The theme of his emails are very often right in line with what Trevor and I are going through. When I am struggling with a decision or a situation, his words often pop up in my email and make me feel better about things. This last week he talked about circumstance. He said this: "When things are hunky dory, you can smile and take some satisfaction. But when they are not, you've got choices that must be made. Even the choice to do nothing shows you something about who you are. Take stock of who you are often, and when you don't like what you find, determine to do something about it."

Last week, during my long workout, I was wondering what it was all for. These words from Jeff reminded me about my marathon 7 years ago. I had started that challenge to prove something to myself - not to anyone else, but myself. At mile 16, I became someone I did not like. I was angry. About everything. When I finished I was not proud or satisfied. I was not energized or excited. I was simply relieved. Relieved it was done and over with. And I was never going to do it again.

I tucked this experience in the back of my mind and didn't think about it much after that. Trevor did two marathons after me and I had no interest in training for and completing another one. We did lots of shorter runs - half marathons, 10ks, but the marathon was uninviting to me. I would go watch friends finish their marathons and feel the excitement of the people who were doing it. I would see how happy they were about their accomplishment and I would tear up because I really didn't feel that when I ran my marathon. I didn't feel that sense of accomplishment that I saw in people's eyes as they crossed the finish line.

This last year, for the first time, I thougth that maybe I'd like to do another marathon. One thing led to another and now Trevor and I are coaches for the marathon training group - Portland Fit. Between the marathon training and the Ironman 70.3 training, I've had lots of time to think. I've thought back on my marathon experience. I have realized that what I gained that day was the ability to see things as possible. Once you do something that you always thought impossible, everything changes. That I like. I like the way my thinking shifted during that time. But I don't like who I was on that day. Even now, I don't like it.

So, reading Jeff's words really hit home for me. When he said "when you don't like what you find, determine to do something about it." I think that is what this whole Ironman/marathon quest is about. At least part of what it is about. I have finally, after all these years, determined to do something about it. I am going to experience this marathon different. I am going to experience the triathlon different.

There are things I don't like about myself and maybe if I can change this one thing, I can change those things too. I feel one step closer to making sense out of all these things I am wanting these days. Taking stock. Its a tough thing to do. But it must be done. So that's what I'm doing. We'll see where that leads me.