Thankful?

It's the time of year when its good to think about what you have. I've been doing that a lot lately. Perhaps now, more than ever, its important to think about what you have, what is good - instead of what you've lost, can't or don't have and what is bad.

Things are scary out there. Seems like every week, I hear from someone new who has been layed off, who's husband or wife has been layed off. Businesses are closing down. Money is tight. Honestly - Trevor and I have been very fortunate for the years we've been together - we've both had really great jobs and could pretty much do and buy whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted it. Boy have things changed. We are now a one income family and my income has gone down about 25 % this year - less business at work = less commission. We now refer to the days of the past as "when money was growing on trees". Nowadays, we actually think about how and where we spend our money. We monitor our bills and look for ways to save - we changed our garbage pick-up to every other week, we went back to a basic cable package, we set the thermostat a lot lower than we used to and put on an extra layer of clothes. I shop at the cheapest grocery store and buy only what we need. We are really at the point now where there isn't much more we could cut out. I've realized that all those things, all the stuff we bought, all the things we did were not the things that made our lives whole. I have a greater appreciation for all the things in my life that money cannot buy. I am blessed with a husband with many gifts - the greatest of which may be his sense of humor. Nothing fazes this man. He is my rock - the center of my life and even if we lost everything, I know that we'd be living on the street, laughing about something every day.

We have our wonderful, loving pets - growing from 4 to 5 now. I cannot imagine our lives without these little furry babies. Some days I cannot believe how full of love I am for them - Opal, Wookie, Gus, Daisy and Roxie. I feel like I could burst. Every day, they make me smile, laugh or tear-up -just knowing that I get to love them and that they love me right back.

I am fortunate to have a fabulous job. Seriously fabulous. My company is a great place to work - for all the complaining that goes on, I couldn't have a better job right now. Sure, its uncertain and I worry about the future of this business on which I've built a career. I don't' know what will happen, but I'm pretty sure things will be okay. I try to remember that when I get too worked up.

Then there is my family. Both my family and Trevor's family are really great people. Trevor and I are lucky. Our families are supportive, kind and giving. They love us regardless of our flaws and always want the best for us. Someone I know once said to me about family he was struggling with - "all you can do is love them." And he was right. There are challenges in every family. If you don't have a challenge in your family....you ARE the challenge in your family!

I saw this quote: "Thanksgiving is a meal that formalizes through food your connections to the people you love, even if that connection sometimes sparks like a downed wire. It's a meal for savoring life as it is, not as it might be, and finding reasons to be grateful anyway." I guess that's a lesson about life in general, not just family. Its time to look around at how things are and be grateful for them....even if they aren't what you had planned. And to know that every day provides a chance to start over - to work toward making things the way you want them to be or to work towards appreciating them for what they are.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Merry Christmas!!!

I know its only November 15th, but really...hasn't it been Christmas time since like October 30th? I saw Holiday items at the store right before Halloween. This seems to happen every year and every year it really pisses me off. I know the stores want us to be in the holiday spirit sooner so that we'll start shopping sooner. All it does is make me feel bah-humbug.

On November 2nd, my Starbucks cup was red, with snowflakes and doves. When it was the same cup on November 3rd, I told the barista (For those of you who don't frequent starbucks...that's the person who makes your drink), that I didn't appreciate the holiday cup. He said to me, "on behalf of Starbucks and all its employees...I apologize". I told him not to mock me and then I think he peed in my latte.

Then, to make matters worse, on November 4th, they had their holiday drinks. This means Egg nog, peppermint and gingerbread....WHAT!!!! I can't take it anymore. I CAN NOT TAKE IT.

Yesterday - November 14th, they brought the Christmas Tree...oh wait...the HOLIDAY tree downtown to the square. Santa Clause was there, so were the carolers. I swear, my blood pressure shot up to about 300 over 290.

I don't know why this makes me so f-ing mad....but it does. As I was sitting in traffic last night on the way home from work, because there was an accident on the bridge, I turned to one of my favorite stations. 103.3 has soft rock - its the music they play at the dentist...so it calms me. I quickly realized that the song on that station was a Christmas song. They've started their 24 hour holiday music. Its November....not even the second half of November....not even the week of Thanksgiving...its two weeks BEFORE Thanksgiving.

We've lost our minds. Maybe we should just have Christmas all year long...why not?

I think this is why it bothers me....Time goes so fast as it is. Don't you think? I don't spend enough time living in the moment, enjoying the right now. It seems we are always looking forward, looking for what is next. I want to enjoy today...not think about six or eight weeks from now. Plus, all this holiday stuff just gives me anxiety about all the things that come along with holiday. Because really...who finds the holidays relaxing? Not me....but maybe that is because by the time they show up, I'm so mad, I can't relax...or be happy.

I need counseling. That's for sure. Until then, Merry Christmas.

So True...

If you read my blog from yesterday, you will find a list of things I said you would see/hear at the Phillies parade. This morning I was reading an article in the paper about the parade and here are some quotes:

"Center fielder Shane Victorino tossed soft pretzels to the crowd..."

"World Series MVP Cole Hamels tried to fist-bump a fan dressed like Philly's favorite fictional boxer, Rocky Balboa, but authorities intervened before they quite pulled it off."

"Phillies manager Charlie Manuel hoisted the World Series trophy Friday while players waved, the Phanatic danced and hundreds of thousands of fans roared in celebrating the city's first sports title parade in 25 years."

These are my people!

Parade Day

Who likes crowds anyway? Here are a few things I can guarantee you would see/hear if you were at this parade today:
1. Someone dressed like Rocky Balboa.
2. The Rocky theme song - as if we didn't hear it enough on Fox Sports before and after every commercial when the game was in Philly.
3. Lots of people with painted red faces and no shirts.
4. Vendors selling soft pretzels.
5. Every "F" replaced with "Ph" - for example...not Fans, but Phans.
6. A sea of red and blue.
7. Someone dressed like William Penn.
8. At least one sign about Tug McGraw.
9......A World Series trophy.

I can't be there for it...but the street sign in this picture makes me smile...because I'm in Oregon right now.

World Series Champions 2008

15 years ago, I sat in my apt in Boulder Colorado and had my heart broken by the 1993 Phillies as I watched them lose the World Series.
Tonight, it feels like no time has passed. The last 15 years have passed in the blink of an eye. After that last strike - my phone rang and it was my friend Meg - from South Jersey - telling me she was going out to bang pots and pans. We talked about 1993 and she called it "our year". A bit later, another friend, Ann, called and said she and her family were drinking champagne from some Phillies glasses that we should have drank from 15 years ago. See below:


I am overwhelmed with homesickness, with thoughts from the past, with years gone by and friends far away. Today is like a dream - actually years of dreams all wrapped up in a few hours. I wish I were home, sharing it with everyone who understands how I feel. With everyone who understands what its like to wish for something for so long and finally have it happen...Philadelphia Phillies....World Series Champs. Who would have thought?

Be part of the solution

"There's only two things I hate in this world. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures and the Dutch." - Nigel Powers, Austin Powers Goldmember

Politics . It brings out the worst in people. Every election season, I cannot wait until it is over. People become a more intolerant version of themselves. We have the extreme right and the extreme left – they are equally ridiculous and hypocritical. Both blame the other for all our problems. The sad truth may be that they are ALL to blame.

During this season, the political emails have become increasingly angry and hateful. One that was sent to us (from someone who clearly doesn’t know how we plan to vote) actually said that liberals are all pieces of shit. Um….I would say that I am a liberal. Why must it be one way or the other – isn’t it possible that I am still a worthwhile person, even though I’m voting Democrat? Believe me, if there is a reason why I am a piece of shit – it is not because of how I vote. But that’s a topic for another day.

My point in this…settle down people…have some decency. Tolerate another point of view. Realize that we all want to do what is right. I don’t mind someone who believes something passionately. In fact – I admire that passion – but when that passion turns into obsession, intolerance and hate…it has gone too far. You have heard it before… God forgives, unless you don’t believe what I believe and then you are going to hell.

It always amazes me how what you believe frames your reality. If you believe something strongly enough – no matter how much evidence in compiled to the contrary, you will never be convinced otherwise.

Can’t we disagree and still respect each other? Is that too much to ask? Is it too much to expect that two people, who have reached the pinnacle of their political lives - they are candidates for President of the United States for God’s sake, hold each other in esteem and honor? It’s the disrespect and intolerance that I can’t stomach, that has spread through our society like a wild fire. You see it everywhere – in the business world, on the little league field, at school, at church.

I have been known to be quite intolerant in my 34 years. I'll admit it. I don't want to be one of those hypocrites. It takes work to change. It takes the guts to realize that you are part of the problem. Because you are either part of the problem or you are part of the solution. I am really working on being part of the solution…being part of the problem wasn't working for me.

Intolerance is itself a form of violence and an obstacle to the growth of a true democratic spirit.
--Mahatma Gandhi

Let me explain....

So, Trevor read my blog from yesterday and said, "We got married in the summer...that wasn't the best summer of your life? We got engaged in summer...that wasn't the best summer of your life?" Those were great summers. I've been with Trevor for 9 summers and they have all been fabulous...There was the summer that Trevor lived out of town from Sunday night until Friday night. How fun was that? Oh and then the summer we got married, Trevor had a broken leg, was on crutches for 12 weeks and wasn't even sure he'd be able to walk at the wedding. Of course, that has to be the best summer ever, right? Granted...all 9 haven't been like those two summers, but we are adults now, we have responsiblities and serious business to attend to.

I am sure that we can all think back to a time when things were simple. At the time, maybe we didn't realize things were simple - we were surely caught up in the drama of our life at the time. But now, we know. The thing about that summer of 93...I knew things were simple...I knew it wouldn't get any better. I really had nothing to worry about. I worked at an easy job, with fun people and got paid well. I didn't have any bills. I just needed money to put gas in the car, pay for a movie or buy lunch when I wanted to eat out...actually, Ann and I usually found someone to go to lunch with us whom we knew would pay for us.

Important decisions had been made in the years that came before that summer. I was already in college, I had already made all the choices that go along with that. Nothing was expected of me that summer.

Those are the reasons why I say they were the best days of my life. Don't get me wrong...I love my life now. REALLY love my life. I have it much better than I could have ever imagined all those years ago. Its just a grown up life, not the carefree life of a 19 year old.

So, I stand by what I said...the summer of 93...those were the best days of my life...the only thing that would have made them better would be if Trevor were there with me.